The Shrimp Boat

Friday, March 28, 2008

let's talk about... how happy i was to go to the pool today.

hmm. actually, today's PE wasn't so bad. haha. one round only. :P then floorball also nothing much. girls team owns :D i think each of us scored one goal lor so cool rite :D and no more mysterious "TING AN!!!" shouts from the 308 classroom anymore. o_O spookaye.

okay. then it was chem. i was really going to fall asleep(this won't do!!!). but whew. at least i understand the concepts la. just need to revise them at home to reinforce it in my brain. and i didn't do too badly for chem test as i expected. whew. yay! though i didn't want to ask those elites in my class for their marks 'cos i dinn want to know that my "good" is actually "not so good". well at least i'm above average bah. hopefully so.

after that was art... then got dismissed early, and went netball court to pass balls with mag/mayfong. quite fun leh. i really love balls(insert something witty but true here). mag was amazed that i used one hand to catch the balls :D hahaha. she's so cute okay. "wahhhh how you do that one! i also want to do!!!" then when she did it she was like "oh YESSSSS" hahaha. so funny. not like my one-hand-catching is very natural also... still need to bounce on my hand a bit de. anyway, mag wanna join canoe polo rite X)

debra was sayin' that the way i throw ball's so weird! haha. i not even sure how i'm throwing the ball. is it the canoe polo way? dunno leh. but hao say my throwing improved le. =D and i think i'm not so weak la.

did passing with mayfong. oh i really love passin' balls. we did it for duno how long then she was tired and i had to go for "badminton".

some meeting about jersey. ahahaha. i told rachel & yx to accompany me to the pool & watch CP :D (but they turned out to be playin' cards -_-)

anyway so we went to the pool and i walked uber fast! rachel was like asking me why i so ji2 (3 to 4 very precious one hour... somemore walk there need 15 mins lol). they were tryin' to keep up then they finally did after the bridge and said "whoa. tiring." AHAHAHA. i didn't really feel tired! maybe 'cos my mind was occupied by something else. then i brought them to the YSTMC shortcut haha. then we went to the pool and saw mr chua! then i went to change le.

WAH. the guys! BLACK RASHGUARD! ripcurl~~~!! hengfoo was like "you all look better with your shirt on..." lol!!! sounded funny lah! like he can't stand seein' the guys half naked liddat! then they all got into their boats... all did warmups. some of them asked me to give them balls(which was practically my job there) and i was happy to do so hahaha.

then i was like tryin' to gather all the balls lor. so i was tryin' to get this "unwanted" ball that was near the edge of the pool(but too far for me to reach). then i was like creating water ripples for the ball to come back to me but it refused to. hengfoo was testing out his paddle near there, then he turned and saw. thought he'd just move on to train the ppl but he backpaddled and gave me the ball LOL.

then i took the ball and put at the end of the pool. then watched them do more passing... people throw out... i supply ball... someone threw at darren's direction to the grass TWO times. -_- haha. heng i was there lor! then helped them get the ball. if not they always have to send someone out to get it de. then someone has to sacrifice some passing time... lol... then when i passed back i pass to randy one. and randy is like far away. but my balls are okay right! hahaha. albeit on land la. quite nice lor.

then supplied ball to tiong and wanyu a lot... 'cos apparently the guys passing opposite them keep throwing too far or someth. haha. then lianhan told me to pump balls, and mr chua told me to too. then i was pumping and pumping and suddenly they got balls fly out again lol. then they told me to pass them the ball but it wasn't pumped yet!!! or someth la. can't rmb. then i was like shou mang jiao luan...

hmm. then hao was saying "tingan don't pump the balls too much! later too hard hit jong's head damn pain..."

LOL! it was mr chua who told me to pump it hard though. i agree it's like rock hard. haha. feels hard to your hand, but hengfoo said "hard then better mah." can't rmb what's his reason liao.

then pumped more balls... supplied more balls... then had to leave le. =(

mr chua said thanks to me for pumping the balls :D no one said bye to me. GRAH. LOL.

hmm anyway... i just heard something kinda insulting. and not gonna put in this post. this post shall end here 'cos i find nothing particularly interesting to talk about with regards to jap lesson.

oh yeah... yx is like damn funny she makes me feel good all the time even though sian... we all gotta face up to reality sometimes.

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
10:18 PM

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

wooo! i'm back after a day of 2 tests, IR & sharkwater.

i really really feel that if i were a test tube of liquid energy, and the liquid had to undergo heat/fires of canoe polo, lessons, mugging etc, i think that last night and today the liquid had almost gone dry. well, almost. a bit of ginseng tea(i know how to appreciate BITTER but GOOD stuff hahaha) & about 4+ hours of sleep kept that little 1 mL of energy within me. enough to take today's tests bah. and enough to survive today even though i actually fell asleep in sharkwater today. :'( i guess it doesn't go to show that i was lazy or uninterested or whatever, it just goes to show that i'm completely worn out lah. don't blame me. =/ i don't remember feeling so worn out before after water training(not like SO tired). hao says it's 'cos i'm not working hard enough. well i guess this trng i did put in lots of effort bah. and i really love it la.

i do understand the plight of the sharks though. the way their fins are so cruelly slayed and seeing those sharks falling more and more deeply into the ocean. Being unable to move & being in pain, yet unable to do anything about it. someone should invent a regenerative chemical to inject into the sharks so that after we slay their fins they can still grow back new ones. & when we slay them, we inject anesthetic! so they wouldn't be in pain. gosh!!! when will we humans ever learn to be considerate!!!

anyway, ate sashimi today after sharkwater. ironic? :D at least we don't just eat the fins okay. anyway, shark meat is okay what why don't we just eat the whole shark, and kill less sharks. i've been thinking about it lah. we humans are also animals what, can't really say that we are disrupting the ecosystem 'cos in a way, we are consumers in the chain too? or maybe we are top of the food pyramid. our technology = our "evolution" & advancement in more efficiently obtaining food. we humans are well, more intellectually developed. it's our upper hand. animals could actually subdue us(see yuanhan's starfish ppt) if they knew the way, and the thing is they haven't found the way yet. once we exhaust our food sources, our population will decrease too. by then those animals that we eat will have their population growth again. isn't that logical?

------------

woooo. now i can update 'bout water training.

it was rainin' real hard. so i stayed in school for a while. studied a bit of bio until nematoda. then went up to the hall where all the badminton players were at but i actually didn't intend to go for badminton 'cos there was apparently no space in the hall. it seemed like a lot of people didn't want to go too. it was raining & we didn't want to go to clementi sports hall. so i wrote names down on yx's fullscap paper. in the end she ponned too. LOL. johannes ponned too. everyone wanted to study bio/chem. i went for canoe polo though X)

lightning activity~~~ i told the (scary) lifeguard that i wanted to look for my friends inside, so he let me in. but he was like kinda scary. =/ no rain but the detector somehow still sensed lightning activity though. lol. pool was exceptionally quiet. we went to get balls to do some passing. i missed and the ball bounced onto the gym glass =/ kenna scolding by randy/lianhan. =/ but anyway i think i'm getting better with the ball la.

then we went to get boats le. i got this boat with metal footrest, and apparently, it was lianhan's boat. i don't get it. aren't boats on a first-come-first-serve basis. =/ apparently 3 = weechye's, 4 = lianhan's, 5 = tankuan's. wth! give weechye another boat, and he claims it's not seasoned so he can't do handroll. what a joke.

okay lah. maybe i won't be able to do it too with footrests that keep sliding out of place even when you place the tiniest amount of force on it. but just let an N-kosong-kosong-B like me use those "good" boats till i am confident with my handroll lor... puh-leaseeeeee... with sugar & cherry on top(good for people like weechye who wanna get fat).

anyways, thanks a lot lianhan for letting me use "your" boat. 'cos it rocks. (lianhan may seem very grumpy/bossy but he'll still help you no matter what. like he was not feeling very well during pt but he still assisted me in my pull-ups. don't think you can find another person like him in the near vicinity.)

it was really a very good and productive training imo. for me lah.

i quickly started off my warmups(2nd right after randy, who was first) so that i could finish them earlier and practise my rolls(and try hipflick after getting it in SP).

about first 2 times, i had to use the wall. (i nvr tried paddle roll again haha because you just don't know whether to use it like a wall or not to use it. might as well not use 'cos it's so confusing) then i tried. and then something miraculous happened OMG. i was like twist my hip and stayed in the air for a split second and my boat was upright again. i couldn't believe it lol. i was like "Oh My God!!!" looked around. hengfoo heard me i think. then i exclaimed "HENGFOO!!! I JUST DID A HANDROLL!!!" i forgot what he said though. but i think he wasn't very surprised ahahaha.

then jong also asked me why i don't use the paddle to do my rolls, and i said "'mmm... cos i don't like the paddle mah... so just do hand lor."

then... omG... i actually did the handroll 2 times successively. it's really like miraculous lah. considering i spent months and months trying to do the paddleroll and failing miserably. i guess that if you keep doing something but still don't get it... something's wrong. and i'm really glad i found out what's wrong okay. (hipflick is fundamental!) i think i'm a genius :D

Hengfoo told me "ting an just keep practising and practising, remember the motion and next time you can do it in the games liao."

gooood job tingan. one point for you. so glad that i'm not saying "i suck" anymore. ahahaha.

then we did passing. made a few mistakes today =x one thing to note: lift up your elbow when you throw. i think it helps. someone was talking to hao about it and i heard it but didn't know what it meant. i repeated after them "lift up your elbow?", then lifted up in my own way and threw the ball(and screwed the pass ahahaha). haha sometimes i think my interpretation of words is wrong. must see demonstrations. hengfoo saw then he demo-ed, "lift up your elbows this way...~~" then i tried and hao said "better" :D

after passing was defend & attack again. i was attacking first with karyen lianhan xuanhao & hengfoo(can't really remember the teammates). i think i'm really getting more and more proactive in the game(i think last time i was very timid and passive). now i guess i'm more confident. i KNOW i can do stuff(like pushing people. i'm not that weak/stupid+brute-force-only k!) so i just go about doing it. though i know i have LOADS to improve on. whatever i'm learning, the guys already mastered them lol. all that game sense and stuff.

i remember there was once i got into shooting position and hengfoo told me to maintain but i waitwaitwait for the ball then we lost possession le lol. then another time i charged =/ then another time lianhan called for ball but he was behind me and i threw it blindly backwards and it went out. =/ and hengfoo told me must pass where i CAN pass. i think there was someone between me and lianhan le.

but there are a few times when hengfoo said "good one tingan!" when i got the ball and attempted a shoot. blah. i think my shooting is like uber uber horrible lah. even if i can get into position or whatever right, if i dunno how to shoot, i think i'm practically useless. there was also once when i attempted a shoot but there were lots of paddle in front of me. shouldn't have shot that one then, should have passed it out to create more shooting chances.

next was defence. lol. the attacking team made some jialat passes and i rushed for the ball le. i think that happened 2 times. think it came as a reflex action to me to get the ball le(i think last time i watch tv during games and i dun realise the ball's within my ability to obtain). think my game sense is improving(though it is something that's already imprinted(somewhat) into the guys' minds already, it is an improvement for someone like ME la). anyway LOL hengfoo was like "go tingan get the ball!" and when i got it he was like "very good tingan!" then people asked jong why he nvr handtackle me. then jong was like "i cap her ta1 hui4 ma4 wo3! (she'll scold me!)" Wah i so fierce one meh lol. then hengfoo heard it and he said "tingan next time people will push you one. so i teach you a way so that you won't get pushed. draw towards the ball..." then he demo-ed. yeah i realised that so difficult to handtackle people even after they JUST move like a few cm away from you('cos when i tried handtackling people i can only touch them with my fingertips -_-).

i think i'm not bad at pushing lah. i just need to do it more and gain more experience then it'll be a reflex action too to me. i don't think i'm a bad zoner(but hengfoo put in the table that i am chaser-- i think that i won't be good enough as a chaser though). and i think that hengfoo talked 'bout not just pushing with the boat bow, i think weehong got teach a bit before. and i've seen the magnetic boats so many times... i think that i know that already. today i tried changing some attacker's direction by sweeping :D

then stop game... hengfoo talked to us. (i will put in point form later on the stuff that i've learnt) then cleared pool. i tried handroll one last time. FAIL lol! nvm! i might not be able to do it again next time but with more practise i believe i can. i can do it!!

okay. stuff that we learnt from this session: (was compiling this during IR)

Discipline-wise

Listen to hengfoo whenever he's trying to tell us something
Don't just keep trying your own stuff --> you'll miss out on what hengfoo's saying
Most important thing to learn right now is game play. Personal boat skills can be picked up along the way
Concentrate on observing good points of other teams, don't just keep wanting to go down the waters to have fun
To improve, it is inevitable that we must force/push ourselves to do stuff we don't like. But we have to be determined and believe that it is for our own good.
Training is not just about playing & having fun, or we will never be able to raise our standards.

Game play!
Defence
[1-3-1 defence formation]
Zoners

maintain position! don't drift/"cross into" other zoners' territory
not impossible to push opponent(no matter how heavy/strong). just PUSH EARLIER, don't wait until opponent approaches! or you'll be easily pushed by him instead & he can then get into any position he prefers
Boat has a LENGTH. don't just use front of boat to push. sweeping can be used to change opponent's direction(using your whole boat to push); back paddling can be used to push opponent out(using stern)
If you play more, you will know more about boat movement and will be more familiar with how to counter every attacker's invasion to zone. you can then push "with strategy".
ultimate role of zoner: to prevent/push opponent from shooting position!!

Chaser

Stop opponents from overloading one side
you just gotta watch hengfoo demo. lol. --> fast, alert, (the game's never relaxed!!! you can see how hard hengfoo's trying everytime)you take care of one you rush to take care of another. NEVER let them have the chance to pass the ball properly

Attack

Watch your passing! --> simple, hand-to-hand passes
once you know you are doing nothing inside, i.e. getting crammed, just parking inside -- no communication with teammates, being pushed in undesired directions etc; GET OUT IMMEDIATELY to support other teammates who will drive in!
Always lookout for ball. don't drive in without a purpose!
only call for ball if you are certain teammate is able to pass to you + you are able to catch + if it is a safe/useful move(i.e. no defenders in between you)
don't always try to shoot. if you see many paddles in front of you, pass OUT! & then create more opportunities to shoot
try not to pass to a teammate that is being marked & opponent is in between --> high chance of interception
always keep moving so as to create open space for passing
picnic situation! not useful to the team to park there. move around!

--> man-marking

(look at hengfoo's magnetic boats. haha)

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ahahaha. i think i can write a minihandbook liao. who wants!! X)

to mag: haha join join join! of course it's about cp lah this is like a learning journal HAHA.

i smile not 'cos i'm smug(very rare ok!). i smile 'cos i am happy okay! and it's got nothing to do with showing off or whatever. i'm just a very smile-y person okay.
(everytime hengfoo praises me i feel like i worked hard to earn a paycheck or something. haha)

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
6:11 PM

CHEM AND BIOD TOMORROW. MURDER!!!!!!!!

"what? so the bio test is straight after chem test? back to back?"
"yep. it will be. you have about 15 minutes break then you come for your bio test lor. *grins*"
"OMG."

wth lah!!!

so i'm staying up late again to mug lor. i'm like... totally NOT a mugger, that's why i have to stay up so late lol. PLUS my bio's not like... really really deep-setted into my mind. sian lah.

nothing to lose le. tmr just 2 tests + IR(gulps) + sharkwaters. then can go home BUT NEED TO DO ENGLISH ROUNDTABLE.

WTflower!!!

no time to blog 'bout today's polo trng le! (though i really learnt a lot)

tmr maybe! (or technically today)

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
12:21 AM

Monday, March 24, 2008

it's good to be emo once in a while. i mean like not break-your-heart-into-a-million-pieces kind of depression... but just reflections + nice soothing music. :D

(am watching randy's vid. LOL. "fasten the pace". really should put apostrophes... after you go to SP you won't think that's fastening the pace le. AHAHAHA.)

okay. today, there was PT lor. not a bad thing. i think that the key to pt is-- don't complain!!! just be determined & carry on until you finally finish the whole thing. this is probably called mental stamina. hahaha.

anyway, so today i ate my lunchbox early lor. then i took the polo ball & went to practise throwing against the wall, and catching with one hand. then FINALLY the food got digested :D i went to the toilet to change. then i came back and i was tyin' my shoelaces. then i was humming this song from huanzhugege(meng4 li3) and was humming real loud and out of tune LOL then guess what. "Hello." hengfoo came O.O ell oh ell!! then he went to change then i did a bit of practice with my throwing & told the floorball guys "GOOD LUCK!!" heehee. really hope they did better this time round and played a better game they ENJOYED. =)

anyway hengfoo asked where we can put the helmets. PE store room lor... but need PE teacher's endorsement... how about the art room. lol.

then wanyu came and she showed me her IR logbook. haha. then she wanted me to go with her to the toilet and i did. but i came out earlier :P then i went to the track once more and i took the ball and swingswingswing then i turned to hengfoo and he became ready to catch ball le lol. so i threw to him and he tried to catch every ball(some the direction wrong le) & he also threw to me. but he from up throw to down, i think he still exerted a little force. then the ball came flying really fast down to me. g = 9.81 ms^-2! then geno came and wanyu came back and jehon & the rest came. then we passed a bit of ball, then warmup le. me & wanyu firstwomen. :D hahaha.

came back, stretchin'. jehon led. then it was the 4 rounds rsrs thing. 3rd time doing it lor. still last for pt. =/ haha wanyu runs damn fast! i think it's cos she pumps her arms a lot harder than i do. haha. she said it's what her teacher taught her last time. i read 'bout it somewhere too.

anyway not too bad lah managed to endure all the way till the end. every stride, i always start off first but end off last one. =/ then hengfoo told me to try to keep up, & tt i was doing well.

whew. finished it. then went to the chinup bars. 100 inclined! my first set was like 21, then 10 all the way lol. i nearly lost count haha. told hengfoo i lost count. then he said "must restart ah" then i miraculously recalled. :P just joking lah.

anyway, then we slacked around a bit, then i did 5 pullups with lianhan's help. dunno why leh, when benjamin(yr6) helped me with it last thursday i could do it with ease(kinda). but so difficult today haha.

then, we went to the track. 30 pushups 20 crunches(real speedy!) 30 pushups bridge(centre, left, right), 30 pushups.

during the bridges, lol the boys talked a lot lah. (actually they just keep talking and talking.) i think i am kind of doing well for bridges. you know what's the trick? your other arm ah, don't keep focusing on like, ways to cheat and use your other arm to support, or keep telling yourself that that arm is adding on to the weight you're supporting. haha. stretch it up like a sundial! or just stretch it lah. then you'll feel quite refreshed. and the rest of the bridge will just be endurance. ENDURE!!!

hengfoo told me i was very good! and wanyu did a good job too. haha. the girls never complain but the guys keep complaining. and we just keep doing.

and then we ended with the last 30 pushups. JIAYOU TO ALL! :D and hengfoo said we were very good :D

(btw i guess the key to pt is to not complain. if you don't faint or injure yourself(be careful!!!), you can do it. there's no limits. just complete whatever you're assigned. =) )

then hengfoo told me to lead cooldown stretchin' & at first i didn't know how but yeah it all came back to me(did it so many times le mah) and i led the group in stretching. weechye was imitating my supposedly high pitched voice.

erm, is there anything wrong? lol. my voice sounds pretty normal to me lor. so irritating leh. my voice my voice la, such a good joke meh.

then we all sat down in a circle to discuss 'bout what me and han saw at SP(hao = 2nd session of pt, not with us). haha. for more info, you may scroll down to read 'bout what i saw in SP. i got record down everything! :D

to recap somemore: once the boat bounces off your bow/stern/boat(in general), it's GONE. those other sch guys are gonna get it man. they are PRO/STRONG MEN okay. haha. so must make sure we do simple/hand-to-hand passes!!!

then we did some passing. fast passing. then FAKE passing AHAHAHAHA. stupid!!! the guys are damn funny. tiong keep saying funny stuff. then we all keep fakin'. then hengfoo once he faked that he was gonna throw real hard to tiong then in the end he throw very gently. HAHA. tt's funny lah. ("ur coach very funny one leh" -- loi heng foo)

then econs.

then it was raining real heavily.

took cab with hao home. what a quiet ride. a nice ride for emo-ing & nice music. =)
什么都已经过去了。我对我们的生活很满意。亲情是可贵的东西。

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
7:51 PM

i'm in school blogging! it's 5 minutes to english and i have already finished my whole lunchbox. actually the point of finishing my lunchbox early is so that i can have time to digest all the food & shit them all out before pt comes.

speaking of pt... i am nervous. :( used to look forward to every session but i feel so nervous now.

i still like water training better. haha. kinda different from last time. i think i used to like dry training more... but canoe polo, is after all a water sport right? water training is really more fundamental i guess. i mean, you can be good on land all you want, but for canoe polo, it's IMPORTANT to be good on the water too! so... if i don't perform well on land... at least i do improve my personal fitness lor. and hopefully that can count for something. as long as i work hard on the waters, i think everything should suffice. and i really feel that i am working hard & learning a lot during each water training.

i really really really LOVE water training man!

so... i finished my lunchbox. i still have a small box of baby tomatoes(strangely they taste like the tomato juice taste). eating them later. maybe accompanying with a cup of coffee to let me stay awake during pt(=not so tired). but if the coffee is too bitter i guess i'll just give it away. i brought randy's ball today. i really like the polo ball now 'cos i think i finally learnt the correct way to handle/throw it. and with more and more practice i think i can actually throw further and higher etc. those sp guys are damn pro man. woooooooo!

yeah!! love canoe polo.

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
12:41 PM

Saturday, March 22, 2008

i keep thinking i've stuff left that i haven't updated about yet. really can't remember what!!!

wednesday trng i updated about it liao mah...

oh yeah... i talked to jehon on msn 2 days ago lor. about canoe polo. (this blog seems like a learning journal to note down things that i've learnt)

wait. i need to go read the chat log.

basically we talked more about boat skills. erm, then we apologised to each other, me for blockin' him & him for screamin' at me. lol. okay. i'll try to be careful 'bout my boat movement/navigation the next time. oooooo. do i go zigzag? jehon also said that i don't play enough teamsport so i don't know the positioning and placements etc? =/ really? he told me to go watch more bball and stuff, 'cos it's similar. blah. it's hard to relate though. imo lah. i prefer to watch hengfoo's magnetic boats play match. lol. but jehon said can't learn much from it? if you don't have background. EH. i no background meh!! o.o

anyway, we were basically talking 'bout rolls.

"jehon's guide to rolls" (in point form)

the boat goes up first, then you go up
follow the boat, don't lead with your mass(body?)
if you can get into the boat and can sit comfortably, you are never too heavy(such that your mass makes you stay in the water even after boat is up; you can even handroll with a brick)
me: wah i think it really depends a LOT on the hip flick; jehon: tt's wat i've been saying...; me: that's what i've been thinking too...
me: i can twist lah but boat move very little; jehon: then you're not twisting properly. you are using your mass to jerk the boat
supposed to be using your waist, flick the boat up, then let yourself follow
face the direction you're rolling towards
try to move your legs to be in line with your body
at the same time slide your body to the opposite side of the boat(this makes it easier to come up)
once you're halfway up, one hand follow through, the other hand come out to throw your CG out
try laying on the floor & rolling.

LOL haha.

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today i went down to singapore polytechnic with han and hao. we were supposed to be watchin' the sp guys play. haha. actually i didn't intend to go 'cos i thought i had math, but turned out that there was NO MATH!!! so i sms-ed hengfoo told him i was going. =D he said to watch only though. but huiling/peisi(from ntu cp) said that even if not playing, bring some extra change so you can do some extra stuff :D and i thought i could be ball picker but nah. so many people were there already. i thought they were gonna do drills and stuff like what we do during our trng but they played so many games!!!

han and hao were discussing(and nvr include me HMPH) but i was just watching lor. can see what hengfoo taught us 'bout moving out and supporting. but these sp guys seem to do it much more efficiently and smoothly. they were very fast, and their ball passing was really good. the ball can go so high and far even with just a wrist flick. (maybe we can be able to do that as time passes?). interception seemed so easy for them(kinda). i mean like, compared to us, 'cos interception rarely happens if the ball doesn't go out or there isn't a foul or stuff. but these sp guys just hold up their paddles and intercept, or maybe someone made a mistake and then the other team guy just goes like almost instantaneously towards the ball. everyone was very alert.

anyway, another pro thing is that they were very good at catching the ball. fast balls, lob balls, everything also can catch. and they're all very sure of what they're doing. (can't describe haha)

also saw for the first time this "referee's ball" thing. and both players capsized jus for the ball! we were like "whoa" lol.

after that hengfoo said we could go down the water le. then i think we didn't pay attention to the game much. =/ we went down to pass ball(and i think i improved :D) & i was tryin' to scoop up the ball with my paddle but kenna scolding by lianhan to tell me to practise my paddle roll. lol. i kept faltering and faltering lor. then they scolded me for being scared(nvr bring goggles). anyway, hao told me to grab his boat and practise my hipflick. then he said that i don't flick my hip lor. then did with the wall a lot of times. hao said i keep moving my body not my hips. but slowly i got the hang of it. jehon's advice slowly set in. but i kept doing with the wall. (eyes closed). but i think slowly i am using less force. hao said i was improving when i told him to watch. haha. i also tried doing with the paddle but both times i failed u noe. i drifted to the centre of the pool lol. and i already kicked until the footrest went out of position le. tried to flip myself but couldn't. then right, went out of breath so ejected lor. haha. both times. the rest of the time i was just doing with the wall. wall can lah. then i tried doing handroll. blah. cmicmicmi!!

actually i felt that i was about to flip the boat halfway over. tried to throw out my hands too but still couldn't get totally back up without the wall. flip halfway over as in stay in that position but go back to the water again lor. but can really feel my hip flick le. hopefully i can master the handroll by these few weeks haha.

i'm not going water trngs next week though. bleh. actually according to the website the pool was open on friday and we could have actually had training. then we nvr go T.T then they had to change TUES to fri timetable... and i have 3rd lang on both tues and fri!!! what to do? should i go water trng or badminton??? mr chua said that i ain't going for competition, so the alternate weeks thing doesn't apply to me. i really wanna go water training lor. see how first. =/

anyway, i really really like rowing the kayak. =D realised how much i really really really love it and feel relaxed when i'm on water. as in, it's like really a form of relaxation & stress relief from the everyday workload. if i can go as often to the pool as possible, i think i'd be very happy.

i just don't want to be so tanned hahahahahahaha.

lololol. we are hengfoo's "kids". 我们是他的孩子! funny lah. people ask him "so these are your kids?" "ya." "so which are your kids?" *points to me* "这个lor" *points to hao & han* "还有他们"

anw. he recently become a very dao dad(alliteration). 0.0

i love the water :D

byea!

TAIWANESE ELECTIONS TODAY. GO KUOMINTANG!!!!!!!!!!!

(i think hengfoo's friends are nice and funny! hahaha.)
ohyeah, he gave me some form for food catering for competitions. when the comp schedules are out, can start to "order" from me le. LOL. i have the form!! you may order exclusive mcdonalds & i may go & buy for you and deliver after math olympiad class to sp. (but highly unlikely LOL >:P) not really sure if i am allowed to go down to support the guys for comp. the solution to this is that i must spend more time studying during the weekdays. so weekends i can be free. jiayou tingan!

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
4:41 PM

Thursday, March 20, 2008

i just realised i overlooked the 500th post to make a big hoo-haa out of it.

nvm. not much point.

this night, i thought i'd be damn busy. but i just found out that some homework weren't due yet! and i found out that some ARE. so i went about doing them and guess what, the teacher said last-minute that it was cancelled! ARRRRRR. i'm so angry!

anyway, blogging now.

i am not sure why but now i feel so sian of IR. sort of lost my interest. is this the correct attitude? i am in a loss of direction. really. i want to do some science project(biochem), and i've signed up for some greenwave competition project. i guess it's to have a change of taste after slogging it out for one year +++++ with this video thing.

anyway, time to blog 'bout today.

we learnt some new stuff from tony kern(i am a software idiot though). like changing the colours, taking still images and making timelapses... interviewing techniques/points of note... i've taken down notes. and i'll have these knowledge with me. but now, i just feel like i'm in no mood to apply them or whatsoever. really feel very sian.

don't judge me okay.

anyway, we left at about 3.20 to go for canoe polo(raining though). jong said something funny or something and i was like "shen me tai duuuuuu(什么态度)!!!" lol. then hao imitated me it was damn funny.

then the guys took 100 years to change. especially jehon. then we walked out together but they jaywalked and left me behind. i was lagging so much. EH. and i was imagining what would happen if i get kidnapped or injured and knocked my head and fainted or something. i probably wouldn't be letting out a big scream or whatever. and i think that judging by those boys' eagerness to go for canoe polo, they wouldn't give a SHIT.

like, i can imagine jehon saying "she's just being a _____ as usual", and xuanhao turning back to look for 2 seconds then walking on. probably wouldn't even give a call if i dun turn up. ("maybe she went home." xP!!!)

thinking too much.

anyway, we went in the pool at 4. i got a good boat today(it's the reason why weechye is good, but not so good today. as in, can't do handroll). felt quite confident lah. wanted to try roll but due to time constraints i didn't. the skin of my blister came off. but i just passed as usual. thank goodness. i think my passing mistakes have really reduced! thank God for that! well that's what i think lah. maybe 'cos the distances are nearer, but i think my passing improved. really. just need to keep practising.

no cross passing today. we proceeded straight to the game.

firstly, me weechye jehon & hengfoo in a team. the other team not alert and we managed to get the starting ball. jehon very hiong. he attempted to shoot from afar(like how he did it during 3v3 haha but the ball went out because he too strong le) but cmi. weechye then told him 'bout what we learnt during hols. DRIVE IN & SHOOT! anyway, when the other team got the ball and we were rushing back, i was trying to rush back but you know what, i kept getting blocked by people, sometimes can only paddle one side. i was trying to move back and find other routes to take but jehon shouted at me damn loudly to tell me not to block.

question: in such situations, do you just keep on trying to go forward with difficulty or do you move back and go another easier and more efficient route? this is when the opponents are making their way to our zone already. and i'm really really confused ' bout this 'cos i today kenna scolding by jehon/weechye 'bout this 13091398547098360946 times.

anyway there was once we all were attacking. i drove in and was in shooting position, called for ball from a team member(i can't rmb who, think it was weechye) and yeah caught it!! then suddenly jehon slid alongside me and asked for the ball. i gave it to him 'cos i thought he'd have a higher chance of scoring than me. but bleh. think he rushing to score or something. didn't get in.

but hengfoo said "good one tingan!" :D i was grinning :D

okay anyway, i tried to push lianhan out during zoning. not too bad. at least now i have a clearer idea of what to do(the whiteboard + magnet boats help). sometimes when they anyhow pass(today passing very lan4) i also scramble to get the ball. but always something crop up, like tiong push me away blahblah. lol. next time i will work on it!

next was hengfoo switched teams and we had randy and tiong. there was once when we all were too slow to go back(and i kenna scolding) and hengfoo just took the ball and rushed to the other side to score. he said it was a punishment to show us that we should have the mindset to rush back as soon as possession's been changed. i do have that mindset! but i try to go back kenna blocked by people! i duno why me and my teammates are always so cramped together.

there was once i tried to drive in 'cos i see a lot of big holeeeees. but hengfoo was there then he just push me away le. anyway, so i drove out and called for the ball 'cos the people were so cramped inside. but we lost possession of the ball :(

i wonder why we like to cramp ourselves.

anyway, i also don't like it when i kenna scolding. so loud somemore. i'm trying my best le. k? just talk to me nicely after the games. i am not being spoilt here. do you think i don't know when i am blocking you? but do you see me being stagnant and staying there, purposely letting it be? i'm also trying to change the situation what. i also feel sorry. but just teach me how to deal with it next time lah. scolding helps meh?

i guess i won't blame people for scolding me(because i should be the one to blame) but hengfoo says you shouldn't scold teammates, and he emphasised this today too.

anyway, maybe today the game pace was so slow and full of mistakes(in the passing) that i probably felt contributive. ahahaha. anyway, think that my game sense improved.

making notes helps. reading handouts helps. listening to hengfoo & looking at his whiteboard+magnet boats helps. thinking about it all the time helps.

i love canoe polo. and i think weechye is a damn funny guy. "byebye!" "hey do you wanna eat ice cream?"

AHAHAHA.

why did/do you want to join canoe polo? if you know and have an answer close to your heart, you know that you're probably in/going to the right place.
("every step i have taken has been to bring myself closer to you." from memoirs of a geisha. this is nothing much btw. just a beautiful phrase. don't anyhow think k.)

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
12:01 AM

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

monday. pt.

i performed very badly imo. performed the worst in my pt group. i really wanna do better. but i guess my mindsets always fail me. ("i cmi liao.")

i duno how i managed to trudge on the last last week we had pt(when we just got our singlets). i guess i derive motivation from the fact that i am not the last. but well, this week i always ended up last!

pt seemed very individual. everyone had to take timings. i sort of find that everyone else doesn't really seem to have any difficulty finishing their runs, while i feel that i am exceptionally abnormal. sigh. i'm just not strong-willed enough.

i only did 20-10-10-10 inclined pullups. after so many sessions! it is such a bad statistic i can't use it as proof of improvement. really. tingan you are SO WEAK MAN. can't stand you!

the only thing i am proud of is that i did 1+3 pullups lor. with a LOT of lianhan's help of course. sigh. i really wanna thank lianhan for helping me so much. he always cheered me on for all my runs, and he offered to help me with my pullups, and instructed me on how i should position my legs and stuff. 有他真好.

thanks randy too for giving me comments 'bout my guys' pushups(go down somemore will splat le).

sigh. i thought i was doing well. i'm actually not lor, compared to others. what is the key thing? to have a smaller density(weight/volume)? so that you will need to expend less energy pushing yourself off the ground in your runs? less energy pulling yourself up during PU/IPUs? less energy for all the other training items? is density really the key thing?

should i go jianfei????????????????????????????????????????????

dejected!!

felt very lousy. so after PT i went to finish my bio then i went to watch the 2nd batch of pt people. lianhan was there too. he helped me with 4 more pullups(darn nice guy though i nearly kicked him). i wanna be able to do 10 in one shot the next time.

why am i always lagging :( somemore i've been consistent for trainings, but why am i still not good enough.

sigh. land training. just to improve your fitness at your own personal rate & goals. if i can't perform as well as others in land training, i shall work hard to shine in water training. yep.

here is a list of the important points to note(for myself, as well as for you if you have forgotten):

job of a zoner

push opponents out of shooting position/out to the side(for side zoners)/out at the back(for middle zoners) without charging keeper
question: what is the point of cramming the opponents together? what does it do? does it restrict their movements so that they cannot pass to wherever they want at will?

job of a chaser

letting in one opponent or 2 for zoners to deal with is fine. prevent overloading by pushing opponents out of shooting zone
when an opponent is left outside with the ball, chaser can try to pressure and chase for ball

passing

when someone is near you, do a fast pass. it is difficult for opponent to block a ball that is travelling so near them(especially when their hands are primarily on their paddles to block high passes) --> this is from the handout hengfoo gave out
when opponent is not so near you, you can pass a high ball but pass it high enough to evade their paddles
when someone is too far away, do not do a high pass as there will be enough time for opponent to travel to where the ball is going to land and chances are that he will succeed in interception. try to pass to someone nearer, row to a more suitable position and call for ball back
have a formed idea in your mind already, before you pass. this is to ensure you do not fumble when you get the ball, and not know whom to pass to(very easy to lose the ball). everyone must be very alert and aware of the game

dribbling

pick ball from under
first sweep after throwing the ball should be on the side where the ball is
place paddle on bow(not horizontally across cockpit) when getting ball(this can apply during cross passing as well)

rolls

head last to come up
hip flick, must be able to rock the boat while lying on it
paddle not too close to face(for paddle roll)
must be comfortable under water
prepare yourself before coming up, don't be too eager

these are either from the handout hengfoo gave or the tips that i have asked from people. i am not sure if they are entirely correct. please give some comments ok? especially the question for the zoners part. (the tagboard is there for a reason).

chem quiz tmr.

many loves,

tingan

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
8:05 PM

Sunday, March 16, 2008

today was the math test. i only ask for a pass. ahahaha. math olympiad lah. T.T thank God it's gonna be over by this term(and i still have ALL my assignments not handed up yet-- must hand up before term ends) and my Saturdays will be free for arrangements for polo friendlies =D same for Jong.

anyway, after math test i "reserved" this interesting book from Andy! The science of emotions, or someth liddat. looks interesting enough! size of earlobes affect how jealous you are? etc. interesting!

i went to NUS open house! i like the freebies AHAHAHA. especially the "to-do list"! so big and cute =D although i already have a winnie the pooh "things to do list".

anyway, i went to the medical faculty booth and asked for a brochure and this guy explained to me about grades needed. i don't understand what he's talking about though, all those A lvl stuff. haha. i don't take A lvls! i take the NUS High diploma~~~ anyway, he also told me about his life. people study together when exams are near, so it's not so bad and not so stressful. they study more when exams are near, and during normal periods of the yr they study a bit, read a bit, and still can have time for their other activities... like that guy i talked to was from FLOORBALL! cool! and he said that they ask you certain qns in the interviews... sometimes the answers you think of are so cliched... but as long as it comes from your heart, and you are sincere enough, they will be convinced. so these 3 years i will be searching for my answer. searching for my passion. yessss i want to study medicine.

i went to take a look at the sports boards. wahhh... 3 of the national water polo players are from medicine faculty! and i always thought medicine faculty was really tough and busy. well okay so i wanna get into medicine faculty! and be nat player too! GO TINGAN YOU CAN DO IT!

now's the time to fix up stuff. haha. whew! settled SOME of my homework. tmr i'm gonna study physics & finish up bits of unfinished homework. if there is more time left, i might revise some stuff and do assignments due on thurs/fri. yes. work time tingan. on monday there will be PT! and i'm a bit nervous haha 'cos i think this sat/sun i'll be bingeing till i become too heavy to do PT HAHA. a pig running/doing pushups/IPUs...

i'm BURNT. i'm a burnt gingerbreadwoman! dun really wanna stay this way... =/ snow white is pretty ok! ahahaha.

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
12:28 AM

Friday, March 14, 2008

haha. i was going to bathe... so i decided might as well update bout today.

just did 5 guy's pushups. i am also not very sure if i am doing the correct way. it's very painstaking! grahh.

anyway, about today.

i was a bit late! but today there weren't many people, so i still managed to get a decent sprayskirt/boat(but the footrest a bit jialat). but NO MORE PADDLE. so i got the damn heavy one =S

anyway, warmup lor. not so bad =D today's weather was very hot. tiong was like "why today so little people?" i said "'cos today very hot mah" "hot good mah, not like last few days, always raining."

yeah... and i was too lazy to put sunblock le. =S

anyway, today i was the only girl =S sometimes i feel that the guys are a BIT impatient with me haha. hmm actually not really. after all we are the same age also. quite fun lah.

so after warmup we gathered in a circle. hengfoo made us do rolls. my plaster came out!! i was trying to fish it out using my paddle but it kept failing. then hengfoo kept telling me to do roll and i was actually just fishing for my plaster using my paddle HAHA. then hengfoo saw what was so amazingly holding all my attention, then he fish for it also LOL. damn funny! then he said "your plaster ah?" "yea..." "okay lah nvm." then do roll le. FAILed both times. according to hengfoo, paddle too near le. okay. i asked quite a few people about this roll thing. gonna make a list later.

next was circle passing. yay. at least i can say today my mistakes reduced le =D i was between hubert & hengfoo lor. not so bad. the distance not so far so i can throw properly =D then it was alternate. a bit harder. then it was the flying balls thingy. i kept throwing to randy/tiong =D and nobody threw to me :( except nice tiong and randy. haha. and the last part, fast ball passing(i kind of am a bit scared of catching this type of balls).

next was cross passing =D still a lot of mistakes one leh. but at least everyone focused. hengfoo said it's cos very little people today, it's very fast your turn, so you don't have time to turn your attention elsewhere. anyway, not so bad lah =D

thanks lianhan for letting me drink your bottle! 'cos i forgot to bring my water today. =/

then... it was MONKEY =D i was passer for first 2 rounds and monkey for last round. very scary lor, when weechye comes. i will quickly pass the ball. 'cos i scared he cap me!!! anyway 2nd round that time hengfoo was the monkey and he bully me a lot -_- he tell me to throw higher than the paddle. i TRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but he always use his paddle to block one leh. i was trying to pass to xuanhao lah. then geno told me to fake him haha. but i nvr! aiyoh. i think the ball kenna block by hengfoo 192958273054982730429832 times. then dunno what happen. think i threw to someone else. :P but i tried my hardest le. will train somemore de. 看我的厉害!!!

anyway 3rd round i was monkey. weechye was behind me, kept shouting at me to keep moving. o.o fierce!!!!!! anyway once was when someone threw a bad pass to hubert and it was too far away. then i chased for the ball. me and hubert were just scrambling for the ball. can't rmb what happened, i just kept paddling and paddling on and could hear people saying "GO TING AN" and "GO HUBERT". then hengfoo weird he is passer he also say "GO TINGAN GO TINGAN!!" damn funny lah. some kind of guy vs girl fight huh. then i got it WAHAHAHA. i got the ball. damn happy lah! haaaaaaahaaaaaaaa hengfoo praised me~~~~~ he said "very good tingan very good!" lol goal accomplished. okay. it is a neverending goal lah. :D:D:D

after monkey was... defence & attack again. i was playing attack first. with randy geno & hengfoo. quite nice. i was being supporter a lot of the time. 'cos i always scared i drive in then i can't see the ball one. haha. quite fun leh. there was once i gave a bad pass to geno =/ actually i dun see how it is a bad pass leh. isn't it right to him? maybe i gauge wrongly or stuff la. then he gimme blackface. lol! ooooops. the hengfoo said "don't blame your teammate for bad pass, blame yourself for not being able to get it." aiyoh. i think this applies for me a lot of the time. butter fingers one leh! okay. must practise catching tooooo~~

ohyeah then geno kept telling me to move in or out or whatever. haha then we kenna restart the game. hengfoo said "don't tell her what to do because you are not playing the correct way also. she is doing the correct thing." yeahman! okay why am i writing this? it is not to put down geno or whatever ok. because geno is better than me. this is just to prove that i've been listening for the last few sessions WAHAHAHAHA. hengfoo said i was "in my own world" the last time we played, so now i make it a point not to be in my own world le. seeeee? i correct my mistakes deeee :D

then there was also once when i was being pushed to the side of the playing area. i had possession of the ball. then my teammates shouting at me to pass the ball. geno i think. then i couldn't see! i just passed to the back blindly. HAHA. then hengfoo said "very good tingan!" hahaha :P:P:P

then we did defence. i was supposed to be right zoner but it was actually weechye doing all the job as a chaser(he is really good). when someone is let in, omG i dunno why i just let them slide in! i try to push, but kind of difficult! i just felt so useless i said "thanks weechye" to weechye 'cos he was actually doing all the pushing. asked hengfoo what i was supposed to do... "just stay in position and make sure you don't capsize." o.o tiong capsized many times. haha. then once hengfoo went to be chaser and weechye and i were the 2 zoners left(tiong went to empty boat). ooooo. anyway, the attackers were saying to overload my side, think 'cos they think i was weakest. sian. but good thing weechye was there to save the day lor. anyway, after a day(or 3 days) of trng, my hands a bit burnt by friction. haha. hengfoo thought my fingers kenna knocked by attacker's boat. "painful rite... it's very painful one." i like the way how he's very attentive to us all lor. (tt's y i like him much better than the badminton coach HMPH) he cares a lot about our feelings and our morale. tells us not to scold teammates and stuff. & though we sometimes disappoint him and stuff, he won't anyhow say stuff like "being with you guys is a waste of my time." he never gives up on us! 我们的福气哦!

then we did shooting. at least i shot in about... 3? out of 10 balls with xuanhao keeping. i am not sure if it's because tyco or what. but i will try harder each time! i wanna improveeeee!!

okay. today was basically a "wrap-up" of the 3 training sessions of the holidays, and i can safely announce that i have improved and learnt from my mistakes from the previous sessions. and i'm very happy! 'cos i think that today i did not make as MANY stupid mistakes as previously. and i think i must make it a point to reduce mistakes in the future too! goooooooo tingan.

pushups are painstaking :(

during debrief, i answered one of hengfoo's questions correctly =D dingding! $1 million for me. =D feel so happy lor, whenever he says "ting an is correct". seeeee? i am learning something too okay!!!

okay. anyway, today marks the end of the "canoe polo season" of the holidays. saturday & sunday will be slog-it-out-with-homework days. GRAHHHHH!

shit!!

time to settle down and learn to love studying all over again... remember about that love letter... oooo.

-list bout rolls: will probably update later if i feel like it.

JIAYOU TINGAN.

P.S. i think xuanhao is really a nice person because he said i can exchange boats with him for a better footrest to better master my rolls. but sometimes i feel kind of unhappy when he says stuff like "u better learn lah u are taking dam long liao lor". BLEH. aiyoh... i know 他为我好 but i think i also have the right to feel a bit discouraged lor. =/ anyway, i will 继续努力! i love canoe polo a lot =)

P.P.S. it is amazing sometimes when i look back to my wheelchair days, the hardest days are also the days when i learn to appreciate things around me more. i realised that i was rarely unhappy when i was in my wheelchair. haha. and now i am up and alive!! appreciate all the things that you have. then you will be happy. =)

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
10:43 PM

last trng session of the holidays. the canoe polo season of the holidays is over~~~(2 days later will have PT again but that will not be holidays anymore... it will be busybusybusy SCHOOLDAYZ).

wah. i am really really tired ok. today's trng session was tiring(heavy paddle GRAH) but it was kinda enjoyable. =D hengfoo rox!

i will probably blog about the details... now i have to study for math olympiad test tmr. GRAH. hate it!!

holidays coming to an end... time to make use of these last 2 days to rush all my hw!!! settling down for busy school life =S i really wish that i can just go for water trng everyday in the morning lor. :(

time to settle down tingan!! time to revert back to old mugger self. term 2 is the time to buck up and fix up everything so as to prove myself a good juggler of both canoe polo & studies. it is time!!!

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
4:27 PM

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

I had better start noting down my thoughts and reflections about today before all the inspiration fly away.

Today:
-Canoe Polo
-CIP with CCF

Okay... start with... CCF first bah.

Today after Canoe Polo I went back to school to do econs proj with joyce(it is sickening ok). Then, I went to take 196 to buona vista mrt to meet rashidah/cedric/tim to be bus ICs for the families coming to watch the magic show. in the end, nothing much we did lol... i thought there were two separate buses, and we had to organise the families & do headcounts... instead there was only one bus, and we did headcounts but it really wasn't very necessary... haha.

anyway, we reached ulu pandan cc where we could see steph, vio, joyce & darryl ushering. sam & irsyad were just walking around looking after the kids. sam told us to keep watch of a particular boy because he had down's syndrome and was running around. sigh. he looked quite normal actually... but i guess it just won't be the same when he grows up. really wanted to say hi to him but the CCF volunteer already brought him up to the magic show. haha.

anyway, the show was really quite... kid-ish! haha! well, expected la. but even I learnt something from it also... 'cos the performers were actually teaching us:

1. that everything becomes possible with imagination. (hope & imagination are what these cancer children need most fundamentally i guess.) set realistic goals.
2. to juggle things, set yourself a timetable with blocks of 45 minutes. between each block, take a rest so you won't tire yourself out. then you can juggle many things! (and i will elaborate on this later on because i think this really applies to me)
3. to believe in the magic in yourself.

it's kind of hard to believe that now when we(16 year olds) are watching magic shows, we're thinking about how that magician is cheating & all the possible tricks they used, while the kids are happily laughing away. just goes to show how much of the innocence we have lost. well personally i feel that i still have a little bit of that left 'cos i found some parts kinda funny. like...

KENNY THE FRIENDLY CHICKEN(KFC)! & that's because the chicken kept saying "the friendly chicken!!!" after "kenny" was called. a bit dumb eh. oh yeah... & the part where the magician was asking the chicken how far it could fly, and it said "how far can you throw me?" hahaha!! & the magician was asking us to open our arms wide to clap and i purposely opened my arms wide to smack joyce & cedric in the face. HAHA. (not really smack lah!) & vio was saying "good one tingan!" hahahaha. anyway i was imagining if my canoe polo teammates came to watch the magic show, whether they'd laugh. i think they won't lor. o.o haha different types of friends for different activities together in my life. my life is full of UNITY in DIVERSITY! hahaha.

Okay. Anyway, today i saw a friend writing a love letter to her boyfriend(won't mention who). awman it was really sweet(i wasn't envious or anything la).

i shall reveal some of the stuff she wrote here(though i cannot reveal who, and i think my readers don't know who it is so i guess it's fine. don't focus so much on gossip luh!!) 'cos it has got something to do with me also.

1. here is a letter to ease your pain of missing me. i miss you too.
2. i love you so much. but please don't get distracted because of me, okay.
3. we must and WILL do well academically, then you can tell your parents about us. then we can prove that bgr actually DOES improve our studies.
4. this letter is for you to read when you miss me very badly and get distracted.

okay. why do these sentences apply to me? aiyoh it's not because i have a boyfriend or anything (o.o). this "boyfriend" of mine rite... i think it's canoe polo lah. aiyoh i've been so distracted by it since i played it. but it's like... a non-living thing -_- (the sport itself is not an animal/plant), or it can write a letter to me to ease my pain of missing it, and to motivate me to get on with my studies. about point 3, i MUST & i WILL do well academically! then i can show my parents how capable i am to be able to juggle both polo & schoolwork.

which brings me to juggling... maybe i should really set my goals & "timetable" le... hai. but canoe polo is really fun lah. i really really love the waters. & the ball. okay... let's move onto CANOE POLO lol!!!

separate post!(which i am not publishing anymore. 18/3/08)

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
8:55 PM

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

my 498th post. =D ever since january 12(2005)! wow... i guess this blog has a significant history le.

Let's look at some lyrics(this is a song Randy sent me, also the music for the canoe polo vid, and it's the song he chose 'cos he thinks this song represents him best)

The Remedy(I Won't Worry) by Jason Mraz

I saw fireworks from the freeway and behind closed eyes I cannot make them go away
Cause you were born on the fourth of july, freedom ring
now something on the surface it stings
that something on the surface it kind of makes me nervous who says that you deserve this
and what kind of god would serve this? We will cure this dirty old disease
if you've got the poison I've got the remedy

the remedy is the experience. It is a dangerous liaison
I say the comedy is that its serious. Which is a strange enough new play on words
I say the tragedy is how you're gonna spend the rest of your nights with the light on
So shine the light on all of your friends when it all amounts to nothing in the end.

I won't worry my life away.

I won't worry my life away.

I heard two men talking on the radio in a cross fire kind of new reality show
Uncovering the ways to plan the next big attack
they were counting down the days to stab the brother in the be right back after this
the unavoidable kiss, where the minty fresh death breath is sure to outlast his catastrophe
dance with me, because if you've gots the poison, I've gots the remedy

the remedy is the experience. It is a dangerous liaison
I say the comedy is that its serious. Which is a strange enough new play on words
I say the tragedy is how you're gonna spend the rest of your nights with the light on
So shine the light on all of your friends when it all amounts to nothing in the end.

I won't worry my life away.

I won't worry my life away.

When I fall in love I take my time
There's no need to hurry when I'm making up my mind
You can turn off the sun but I'm still gonna shine and I'll tell you why
Because

the remedy is the experience. It is a dangerous liaison
I say the comedy is that its serious. Which is a strange enough new play on words
I say the tragedy is how you're gonna spend the rest of your nights with the light on
So shine the light on all of your friends when it all amounts to nothing in the end.

I won't worry my life away.

I won't worry my life away.

I won't and I won't and I won't etc.

----------

cool isn't it! i don't wanna worry liao. too tiring. hengfoo said that you shouldn't keep thinking bout the sad stuff('cos obviously you will be sad). 'cos there's no point worrying about problems you can't solve, and those problems which you can solve, you don't have to worry. problems are just there to make you stronger.

& i know i am growing stronger okay. i got muscle aches from ytd :D

anyway, must learn to be thankful and happy about every single thing in your life, like your friends & family.

hence, i will put a list here of what things make me happy(in other words, things that i like):

i like to wash my hands with soap. 'cos it smells nice & i feel good after tt.
i like to take a long time to shower because i like to massage the shampoo & conditioner into my hair. i like to use very nice shokobutsu body soap too. then i'll smell really nice after my shower & i'll feel good :D
i like to go to the toilet in school to fix up my hair a bit occasionally. i also like to go to the toilet to change into lighter clothes for a run or for PT. then i will pin my hair up & i know that i look like a strong young lady. perspiring women are beautiful ok.
i like to crack jokes
i like the feeling when you just look at someone and you can burst out laughing 'cos of some shared joke(that doesn't need to be voiced out) or 'cos of practically nothing... 'cos we both just like to laugh. i like laughing. i like the feeling of laughing 'cos you just feel so happy. it's a very precious feeling.
i like to dress up :D i like to do up my hair(sometimes)
i like to tire myself out physically. i like to talk about my own progress.
i like to listen to people telling me stories when they really want me to listen. &... i like to tell stories too :D
i like small children/babies. i like cute stuff-- which i define as being either magnified or made smaller than usual.
i like notebooks. i like cute stationary.
i like it when i do dribbling during canoe polo warmups 'cos i can pick up the ball from under now.
i like to play with balls. i like captain's ball & i like to throw the ball hard & far(can't do in the water though =/).
i like to be taught stuff. so i liked it when xuanhao tried teaching me ball throwing on the... 12th february if i didn't remember wrongly.
i like the feeling before i throw a ball 'cos i expect it to go far(even though it doesn't =/)
i like the feeling of getting back up after i cap, and leaning on the boat.
i like PT because there are many people doing it with me & i have lots of motivation.

anyway, i thought i was strong but hey just realised that there are so many other girls stronger than me(btw strong here means like... arm power... stamina... etc). so i will work harder. =D

Anyway, just thought of what i DON'T like. i don't like it when i am singing and you disrupt me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! blah.

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
12:05 PM

Monday, March 10, 2008

Wah. I just read something I shouldn't read. Thought I had it all thought out. I guess it's not always easy to forget some stuff. Feeling kinda sad now but trying to make the emotion blurrer so it wouldn't just pierce through me like a sharp dagger.

Sigh. I really need to stop myself from becoming sad. Even though I think nobody might care. Least of all, whoever's concerned in the stuff I read.

I feel like crying but i guess i should really promise myself that i can only cry once a year. maybe that's a goal worth working towards.

don't worry about me lah. now i will concentrate on my studies, canoe polo & not this crap. Even though if my dreams came true, i would really live life very happily now; i think that if it came true... it won't really be the best thing to happen also.

sigh. we're all gonna turn 16 this year man... when's this whole thing gonna stop? i know i'm already considered a loser, someone out of this whole thing le. but i have right to feel sad... so don't care about me lah. dunwant to worry you over this kind of thing. just let me be myself and let me handle myself. go and be happy. it's okay one.

wahhhh. feeling sick. emotionally.

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
9:24 PM

Haha. Wow I finally decided to allow access of my blog to certain people... I guess it's better this way. I can like, retract the permission whenever I want, and give whenever I want. If you wanna read my blog, you have to ASK ME(I am a true advocate of FRANKNESS & STRAIGHTFORWARDNESS). But the thing(or the paradox) is, if you wanna read my blog, you have to ask me, but if you weren't invited in the first place, you wouldn't see this post/instruction, and you wouldn't ask me. Okay... it's a false dilemma...

Anyway, today was physically & mentally draining. Don't get my connotations wrong, I like the physical tiredness. But mentally... it's always kinda dreadful isn't it. You'll be listening to slow songs on the bus instead of fast/happy ones, and falling asleep and waking up with painful ears after the iPod blasted loud Maplestory music into your ears(on shuffle)... And then when you walk home from the bus stop it's always some lethargic journey... you don't even feel like going to bed... you just take out your chemistry practical and slog it out... and when you feel really tired you decide to rescue yourself from this shit by making a cup of milo...

Well, that's what i did. lol.

I don't think I'm actually the type who starts homework so early in the holidays(well i used to be, maybe in year one/two. everyone motivates each other, we weren't so busy then). Last year and this year I've been so stretched/compressed/stressed that whenever there's holidays, I'd just go all out to play & relax. Well, that means not doing any homework/studies, which is basically what most of the other people do during June/November holidays... 'cos every semester there're different subjects. (there ARE people who do studies in these holidays so they can accelerate... but i think i just can't settle down to do it. These are also the Einsteins who complain after tests about getting a score that are higher than you. ._.) Hmm... last year I went back to canoe polo(I went for a few sessions before my operation, Chad was the coach then) after my leg healed(November). Haha. Just nice. Weehong JUST came and my leg healed just in time for Weehong's first session with us(also remember that's when Jehon & i teamed up for sprinting and i SCREWED up but Jehon was the screwdriver to fix things up anw). Liked him(WH) a lot. Today, Darren said something about you feeling good after training with Weehong every week 'cos he'll always say "very good! continue to try harder! practise somemore! good!" et cetera.

Lol I can't remember why I am talking about the past again.

Anyway, didn't really know some of the people in the team that well. A lot skipped training. Tan Toilet(W.C.) has always been consistent lah.

Okay, why am I talking about Tan Toilet? 'Cos... he's probably the cause of my "siansation" on the bus today -_- couldn't be bothered to be pissed off with him because too tired lah. -_-

Dunno whether my anger with weechye is justified. Okay lah, it's okay if he caps me. It's okay if anyone handtackles me. 'Cos it's part of the game mah. It's okay one(even if i cannot do roll yet). Well, today I capped two times la. First time I think Jong rescued me(because it was after the game okay, which brings me to WHY weechye wanna cap me in the first place). WHEW. 2nd time nobody rescued me -_- I ejected & guess what. Weechye was laughing at me -_- (the nananipoopoo sort of way). Got real pissed off. Threw my helmet at Weechye's head(it was SPOT ON. HA. & i thought i wouldn't be able to throw to him). And it hit his helmet and he was like "HAHA(nananipoopoo sort of way) hit my helmet." & he made faces at me. So I said "NO EQ!! No wonder ___________ doesn't like you."

Okay. And I meant it. I think it'll affect him in one way or another(even if it doesn't show). I rarely say stuff that will adversely affect others(and believe me, i KNOW what REALLY affects you, and it is NOT vulgarities. it would probably be attacking your insecurities), unless you really really got on my nerves. Nowadays I also find myself thinking about the F word(when I'm angry) and sometimes maybe saying it under my breath. Can't believe it 'cos last time that word would never cross my mind. And today the B word crossed my mind(bus first, bus 2nd, ____.) as well. Guess i'm becoming vulgar ._. wahlao. but it also goes to show how pissed off i was today la.

Another thing is that I think I nearly made weechye cap also. I also trying to play and do my part wat. It's not that I really wanna make him cap and kill him liddat... I also dun really want it to happen one. Just a note that if you meant to do something bad to me and you succeed in it, i will forget it after a short while. If i accidentally do the same thing to you, it's NOT ON PURPOSE LAH DAMMIT. This sentence implies that I think weechye capped me on purpose. Whether it is part of the game or not, the nananipoopoos & jibes at me shows it all lah.

SPORTSMANSHIP!!!

Okay anyway, I didn't mean to NEARLY cause weechye to cap(because he is PRO. something i admit also. and he managed to prevent himself from capsizing). But could hear him say "ohshit wtf"(or something along that line) so i know i think i offended him liao. Anyway, we were restarting the game and weechye got the ball. He threw it up in the air, thought he was gonna pass to someone. HE PUNCHED THE BALL RIGHT INTO ME. Everyone saw ok. And they were like "WHOA". Hey this is not part of the game liao. ON PURPOSE ONE! If I wasn't wearing life jacket I think i would have died from ribcage breakage.

Okay. And this is all that I have to report for today(because the rest about stuff I learnt today is for me to reflect think & note down at night when I have lots of time to think). I'm just really pissed off. Loooong time since I flamed anyone in this blog, and it's good that I made this blog private. I am not saying I will hate weechye forever(though the phrase "i hate weechye" almost always resurfaces after JUST one/two weeks of hiatus). Anyway i think that he probably is pro enough so he thinks he has the right to treat people like that.(he probably thinks i am a sucker) anyway after today i will just forget everything that happened liao. next training will be brand new start to learn to get along with weechye.

Anyway, few posts before i mentioned something bout Hengfoo saying you mustn't keep blaming your teammates 'cos will bear grudges one. & i claimed that i wouldn't bear grudges so i have to make this a self-fulfilling prophecy. won't bear grudges agst anyone. so don't bear grudges agst me just cos you think i bear grudges agst you -_- vicious cycle... am i not a generally nice person...? i'm trying hard to get along with you also...

Anyway, let's backtrack. Why I started my hw so early this hols. 'Cos few days ago Hengfoo said i shud study hard, be able to excel both in studies and in polo. That's why i wanna buck up in my homework liao(hey i didn't use to be such a bad student okay at least i managed to get >4.0, just that now it seems a bit harder than in yr1/2). Think that if i do well in studies(and not just polo), hengfoo will be proud of me also. And my parents lah most importantly. Can show my daddy that even if he doesn't approve of it, i can do it!!! i can do both polo & studies well, he doesn't have to worry(he is actually more worried that i turn into a tomboy; but how can tt be? i am such a... self-claimed sweetest girl on earth...).

so... i need help with hw man... just feel so tired :( hopefully tmr i'll feel fresher. so today just do whatever i can, tmr can chiong hw all the way... this is mental power... and i guess mental tiredness is more difficult to tackle than physical tiredness. no wonder i find it hard to settle down. need lots of concentration to settle down.

during ldrship workshop on saturday, learnt some techniques about making goals according to the SMART acronym... i think i will start setting my goals one of these days...

what to think about at night: how to attack/defend; my weaknesses

kinda stressed bout wed. duno what to do. this morning xh was late & we couldn't do filming(don't blame him. blame the jam). Weechye was perpetually rubbing it in and saying "oi time used up is your business. no extra time will be given for filming." well ya i know... he doesn't need to keep saying so... but then this video thing... isn't it a project worthy to be pursued... PROMOTION for the sport! even yunzhi doesn't mind lor. hai. anyway, the thing is wednesday lianhan not going... so... dunno... maybe ask tiong? at least tonight & tmr can discuss about how to organise this whole thing bah.

really hate the jam and whoever's talking to my dad on the phone in the mornings cos makes my dad drive slow. can tell lor. we already reached the pool and my dad was talking on his phone... and the car was travelling damn slowly i couldn't take it anymore. T.T

hopefully this wed will be better. as a punishment to talking on the phone(!!!) & driving so slowly i will wake daddy up at maybe 7 AM and we will start off at 7.30. then he can yak all he wants and drive slowly all he wants. -_-

hopefully the bus doesn't pangseh xuanhao this wednesday...

really grateful to xuanhao for supporting me in the video proj all this while... without a word of complaint. he's really a good person. ("whatever happened that made us close friends, luckily it did." <--he said that. & even though i feel that i personally sort of drifted away from this friendship recently hopefully it will still remain intact after all these years all the way until we are 100 years old, like me and junle liddat.) and good at the game also. the guy whom hengfoo says "very good" most often to... i wanna be like him man. hopefully after some time hengfoo will say "very good" to me also. my goal lor.

-end of today-

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
5:42 PM

Friday, March 07, 2008

Sometimes I am wondering what makes our life valuable and deemed as meaningful.

High school is very much unlike adulthood. Everything's to a much smaller scale. So what makes high school life meaningful? Attending lots and lots of leadership conventions, forums, grabbing as many leadership positions possible for a good eportfolio... does this really make life more meaningful?

This is not a hasty generalisation or an attack to the student leaders who really dedicate their school life to serving the student population... but I think that obtaining a leadership position and then attempting to make nothing but your position(and not what you do) known to others, just makes leadership lose its meaning. Why do you think I'm in the position to say this? 'Cos I've done it before(not that I wanted to blah)! The feeling's not good, really. You just don't feel secure.

Well, going to all those student leaders forums stuff is sure beneficial,(though I've never been to one so I don't really know how it actually helps) but sometimes, humility is really quite important in a leader. Sports, music, arts, are these aspects of high school education/life inferior to leadership? For example, a person very proficient in, say, literature, but holds no leadership positions. Does that give the other leaders in our school to belittle & speak to him/her in a condescending tone?

Nope. It's not right, is it. Judging a person's character by the number of leadership positions they have is not right too. And it is just such a sad thing that the people in our school are too blinded by generalisations & stereotypes.

Just talked to a friend. This guy's been my friend for very very long(but the friendship sort of died), but he's progressing further than me. To him, he manages to find something useless in everyone, so in order to stop finding uselessness even in HIMSELF, he starts to participate very actively in school activities(especially leadership stuff). That's good. I support him. Good that he knows what he really wants in his life. And what he wants to achieve.

What I don't like, is the condescending tone he uses with me whenever I share stories about my life and what I am doing. Can anyone tell me, is there anything wrong with what I'm focusing on now? Well, looking at all the seniors, describing in detail about the juniors they are proud of, I noticed that I don't fit their bill. What am I doing this for? Well I guess it's not for people to be proud of me? It's because my passion really lies in it, and I love it so much I think I'd want to do it on a national scale(not just within this high school). Are these kind of people always the ones being looked down upon?

It's like, I really want something and I'm working so hard for it. But the people around me don't really judge things based on your ability and your efforts put in? They probably already look at you with tinted glasses and deem that you are incapable, maybe because of some other reasons/stereotypes about you. Though sometimes, those proud arrogant asses do step back a little and listen to you(if you claim you are suicidal, that is) and give you a BIT of advice.

Well I guess the best friends that I can best relate to will be those who really like me for who I am, and not WHAT I am. Those that can encourage me, praise me, tell me they are proud of me & that they enjoy doing stuff with me. Yeah. That's why I love my girlfriends, my coach(CP) & my PT teammates so much(some maybe during PT only because they become arrogant asses after that).

Lol. It's okay lah. I guess life will be easier when you decide to be nice to people as much as you can. If they are really being total asses just ignore them and occasionally flare a little temper at them. At times when they are worth being nice to, like maybe during PT they probably stop scolding you like they do usually, or they encourage you and teach you a bit of stuff, or joke with you, I think it really gives you no reason for you to flare your temper at them at that point in time. Just a thought. Try to be nice to everyone as MUCH as you can, try to include everyone, try to make everyone feel valued. Those are qualities in a true friend, and of course, to go along with this post's topic, qualities a true LEADER should have. Besides doing things & contributing brainpower(IQ), EQ is also very important! Best leader I've seen so far? My coach!

Anyway, whatever I'm doing now, I believe in it. Whatever you guys are doing now, I believe in you. Don't give up whatever you are doing. I'm here to assure you that you are a valuable person to me. =) And I hope I am one to you too.

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
8:35 PM

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Grahh... hopefully that's the last goodbye to emo-ism.

So... let's talk about Monday bah. 'Cos dunwanna talk about what happened last week. All no good one.

Okay anyway this Monday at least I can say I've done well for PT. It's what Hengfu said(NOT hengFOO!), 'cos I said he must encourage me as well besides encouraging Jong, 'cos I also almost cmi liao. But good thing lah... today probably Jehon they all slower or something... or maybe when I wore the singlet I felt cooler, or maybe 'cos the weather was benevolent enough, I managed to continue to trudge on lorh.

Let's start from beginning lah. At first it was raining and I couldn't find Hengfu anywhere at 2.30pm. So went up and down finding, then all the PT pple also nowhere to be found... turned out they were outside staffroom collecting our CP shirts/shorts. Eeyer no one called me =( Haha. Anyway quite happy to get them. But SINGLET!!! :O Mr Chua said everyone had to be uniform, so all change into singlets. *gulps*

The singlet was kinda too large for me. But still okay lah, very cooling that way, and covers where it should(lol). So... went running. Hengfu said we looked nice =D all red. As usual, me and Hengfu in front lor. But I was sort of needing to pee, so I ran a bit faster lol. Dripping with sweat only after just 2 rounds of warmup lah! Kinda unbelievable & unexpected. Went to toilet to pee =D

After I came back, it was the same 4 rounds r-s-r-s thingy... blah. I thought I'd dread it but hey this week wasn't so bad. At least followed Lianhan's advice, so no stitches =D Not bad lah... managed not to walk, though recovery was really the worst parts, 'cos you just need to continue to run(slowly) after striding so fast, it's like braking the car. Anyway I was gasping for breath! Felt like couldn't take enough oxygen(felt like some asthmatic patient). Was using my mouth to gasp in air liao lor... then tried to tell Hengfu lol. But still ging-ed on lah.

Yay =D finally done. Hengfu announced a one round cooldown run. BLAH. And I was like kinda tired at that time... but no choice... so I told Hengfu "Hengfu can i be first runner pls pls pls?" And he said "ok." then he told the rest that they cannot overtake me HAHA. But Weechye and randy were closing up behind me i think... then at the 300m mark they stopped there to jog on the spot(and sing?) while waiting for the rest. I went to finish running the last 100m lol. Then the guys ran finish together.

After that was IPU/PU. Not tt bad. Hengfu told me 3 sets of maximum. Try 15 this time. And he watched me do 15, then said "one more!" 5 times! JOKER!! Kind of knew he would say that lah LOL. But anyway only did 18. Last 2 not counted :( Okay. I wanna quickly hit target of 30. Hengfu says after that he want me do pullups liao. Kinda exciting right. =D

The guys did 100 for each team. 3 pple in a team. Same teams: Randy, Weechye, Tiong; Jong, Jehon, Lianhan. Not bad =D

Hengfu Lianhan and me were talking. Duno who said Hengfu's arms damn big, then he say he actually has fats one. It's got something to do with diet, and he doesn't diet. So I said, "cannot drink zhen zhu nai cha right!!" And he said ya. Then Lianhan was like "oh shit i always drink bubble tea" LOL. damn cute lah. but also can't tell that Lianhan always drinks bubble tea. he so free go buy everytime sia..

Anyway after IPU/PU was the pushups/crunches/bridge/leglifts. I think this is the part of PT where unity is most shown... like when we do pushups, we shout "SAAAAAAAAAAAAAR." Hengfu taught us to do that, probably 'cos it's a bit like saying "we're all in this together". Quite cool =) I like!! Then we had to do all the terrible bridges(must stop thinking it's terrible.) haha. Anyway it was quite good work lah. I was sweating like crazy. Can see the droplets of perspiration drip drip drip... after my run also... lol. I like it that way! Shows I'm working!

Then after that was ball passing. I LOVE MY PT MATES =D LIANHAN JEHON RANDY WEECHYE JONG TIONG =D love them so much =D week after week we're always training together. it's really really cool lah. like hengfu a lot too =) great coach!

And yeaaaaaaaaaaah man muscle aches! =D I AM WORKING & GROWING! I LOVE CANOE POLO OKAY!

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
7:23 PM

Monday, March 03, 2008

“到现在我才知道爱你跟不爱你都是不能假装的。”

“我只是一个他遗忘的我，心被一扫而空。”

“除此之外，非常遗憾：你的心我还是打不开。but if you need somebody, 我确定我会在。”

我会的。不过你应该不需要我了吧。我只能说，我为了这整件事情，让自己累了好几年、伤心了好多次。

“记得要忘记，忘记；我提醒自己：你已经是人海中的一个背影。长长时光，我应该要有-- 新的回忆。”

“我还有一辈子，可以用来努力，我一定会忘记你。”

“人无法确定会为谁动心，但至少可以决定放不放弃。我承认我，还是会爱着你，但我将永不再触碰这记忆。”

我真的觉得好累哦。不想再想了。你不想继续留在我的生命中，那就快点消失好了。我也很想死了这条心，才不会那么痛苦。我们两个是不可能的。这个道理，我终于明白了。

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
11:08 PM

YO! =D

Well... I'm rather busy tonight because I need to be a good student and study for econs XD (Need to really really study hard if wanna score well though)

But one sentence: I really really enjoyed PT today.

Things to blog: last week's routines, wed training(i kind of forgot what happened actually), friday training(made a GRAVE mistake), capt ball on fri(FUN!!).

see you later! if i have the time to come back to blog. not sure if i feel like studying econs a lot a lot a lot. see how the people who have taken the test say lor. NOTE: I AM NOT ASKING THEM FOR QUESTIONS. just asking how hard the test was. not an offence, right?

Tingan rode the Shrimp Boat.
6:46 PM